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More than Just Hair!

More than Just Hair!

...by Natalie Phillip

When my daughter Trianna was born, she had a head full of hair. As she grew, the hair went in the opposite direction. Once she learned to move her head side to side, she developed that bald spot at the back as some babies do. Then she started pulling it out…just because. What wasn’t pulled out came out with something some babies develop called cradle cap. Being our first baby, we were clueless as to how to deal with these different stages. Let’s put it this way, after dwindling down to peach fuzz, she was then BALD. Yep…no hair.

I grew tired of people saying “He’s so cute!!” Then it was “She has no hair!!” I am going to be completely honest with you…I developed a complex. It was MY complex. She didn’t know any different. I realized what was happening and I had to stop it…in my own head. It was going to be okay! Was I being vain? Was I going to allow her (by my reaction and disappointment) to know that she was lacking something? I wasn’t going to do that to my baby. I had to get myself in check and show her by example where her true beauty lay. Her confidence needed to be based on who she is inside and I (being her mother) had to teach her that. So I had to get over it. I didn’t want it to define her or stop her from doing anything. She didn’t even realize how little hair she had until we look back now…and her confidence is still through the roof.

By her first birthday, it started growing back “very slowly”. I was anxious to braid, put in clips, hairbands and the like. I had one lady tell me not to worry because her daughter was also bald and eventually had a full head of hair. She was right…though it took a little longer, by three years old Trianna had hair and it’s now a full head of hair!!

She is now approaching her 9th birthday. When she sees people who knew her when she had little hair the first thing they say is, “She has so much hair now…remember when she had no hair?” It doesn’t phase her one bit and I love it.

Whether it may be something as simple as hair, fears, or bad habits…it’s so easy to pass on our own issues to our kids without realizing it. We always want better for them, but little do we realize that it starts with us as parents. Let’s do better, think better, and be the example of what we want them to be. Let’s make sure they are fully equipped with a confidence based on who they are on the inside and that their outer beauty only enhances it!!!

By the way…guess who had to encourage a lady the other day who was so conscious of the fact that her baby girl had no hair? I saw myself in this lady and I saw the disappointment as she tried to laugh it off. I was able to have this conversation with her and it felt awesome to help someone else. It’s more than just hair…go a little deeper…be a little stronger…the little ones are watching and they feel what you think is unknown.

  • http://thenaturalwomantoday.blogspot.com/ Tonya

    She is beautiful!

  • Caleb Harid

    Wow that was so deep and inspirational !!!

  • Marsha

    That was awesome Nat! Love it!

  • Cheril

    Nat, leave it up to you……Your points are right on target. You go girl.

    Great Job!

  • Carla

    So proud to be related to you. Awesomeness! :) On a serious note, I really need to be getting the tips to enable my hair to flow in the same way that all of the ladies who fall under your touch do!!

  • http://WWW.BELLASBIOSPHERE.WORDPRESS.COM MS Lici

    Wonderful story thank you for sharing. I couldnt agree with your last line more: “It’s more than just hair…go a little deeper…be a little stronger…the little ones are watching and they feel what you think is unknown.”
    Children are smarter than we think and they catch onto more than we would like to believe.

  • Lashon

    Thank you so much for this blog! Right on time too. I have a daughter whose hair is also growing “very slowly”. She just turned 2 years old and I have been reading and researching and reading and researching as to why her hair isn’t growing. Her classmates at school all have long hair so I feared that she’d develop insecurities. I’m very protective of her. Quick to do battle should anyone say a thing about her hair, even shaving my own head (big chop) so we could grow together. In reading this…I have to say, THANK YOU! And let me calm down. My daughter is smart and beautiful and she is not the only one walking around with a tiny afro. I will listen to what my mother has been telling me for months…”her hair will grow”.

    This blog has centered me today. Thank you! Wow…I needed this.

  • http://discoveringnatural.blogspot.com Sawah

    What a wonderful blog post. When my first daughter was little she also had little hair and that bald spot. People advised me to cut it but I didn’t. I continued braiding it and it grew. She is now 7 and even though I messed up in the middle by texturizing her hair, I have not stopped doing it and she has been fully natural for 1 year. This also convinced me to be natural. I am transistoning and in my 3rd month. I am blogging my experience. Your post will encourage so many women going through this stage. Thanks. – discoveringnatural.blogspot.com

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